#1: JUDGEMENTS

Hey guys!

In this my first post I’ll share a little bit of what made me take so long to create a blog.

Has anyone ever felt the pressure of the opinion of someone who matters a lot to you about a certain decision in your life? And the pressure from people who are not that important? Has anyone ever had to rethink a behavior when other people are looking at you? Or even just when you know they are there (even if they are not looking)?

That’s right.

The delay in creating this blog comes precisely from this fact: judgments.

Clearly, looking at it from an evolutionary point of view, judgments are great because they allow us to survive and reproduce. Remember when you looked at that food in the fridge and thought “gee… it’s really spoiled here” or even when you were walking down the street at night and thought “I’d better go the other way. It seems a bit suspicious being here”? These are very common examples of judgments that allow us not to have indigestion or to just go home safely.

But our judgments can sometimes go far beyond reality and make us slaves to thoughts that guarantee neither survival nor reproduction, and bring us more and more insecurity, fear and inertia. Judgments about “what others will think of us on a certain action” or “what our family members expect from our future”, for example, are issues over which we have no control, and it won’t improve in any way if we have to hide our own self to fit other people’s expectations — you can even try, but you’re further and further away from your own happiness.

Between pleasing others and living your life the way you want, always choose your happiness, because this is the most important aspect of our life.
But happiness is not that amazing picture on instagram with a beautiful landscape in the background, smiles and 50 friends. Happiness is the certainty of making the right choices for you to live a life that you will be proud of in the future. Don’t think about being proud of your mother, your brother, your friend or your boss. Be proud of you, for youself.

So the next time you have to make a decision in your life, choose your happiness over the approval of others, because the latter has a very short term.